Supplications to Fear

by Qwo-Li Driskill (more...)
Posted on January 3, 2004

Supplications to Fear
-after Joy Harjo

I.
Fear is a pomegranate
split open to reveal
an infinity of teeth
soaked red and gleaming.

II.
On the inside of my throat
are rivers and tributaries
of snarled wounds
from where Fear
frantic thing
tries to scratch
and writhe Its way
out of my body
only to meet the cage
of clenched teeth
and my own whispered
Stay Please stay
I don't know
how to live
without you
anymore

III.
I fell into It
palms outward
hoped I would hit grace

But now Fear
hard as pebbles
is stuck under my skin
where I can't dig It out

IV.
And just look
what I've done
to my hands

V.
Fear
if I did not have you
I'd cry inconsolable
in the middle of the street
scratch and bite
anyone who'd try to stop me

I'd open the street

VI.
I have swallowed Fear
like gasoline
Threw a match down after It
A burning host
This is my tongue on fire

VII.
Fear demands your ribs
cracked open to scream
Its name unembellished
from your lungs

VIII.
My hands are not mine now
Fear has them
Turns them against me
and with all the strength
they could use to open concrete
rip my face and throat
into a veil
red as pomegranates

IX.
To stop teeth from grinding
My tongue blankets them
and is left
a field slashed open
a cleft in the rock
that does not pour water but
genuflects
sings mea culpas
prays for a scar
to block the blood that pours from my mouth
Croons

X.
You sour
the milk I carry
Threaten to infect
my children
But I'm leaving
You won't lay my hands
on me again

I will gnaw you
out of me

XI.
Look what you
have done to my hands
They split open
like the streets will

XII.
Underneath asphalt
Earth still pushes
moist breath
unembellished
from her lungs

I am tearing away
at concrete
using fists and fingernails
my jaw unlatched
like a rattlesnake's
I will crush this

I am crying inconsolable
until I can see our hearts
beat life back into our tongues

I am crying
but not for you Fear
Not for you